Barbie

You may be wondering why I would post something with the title "Barbie". Well, I did a pretty fun thing this morning. All of the Mattel Barbies in the world are made in either China or Indonesia. Mattel Indonesia grants one tour/month, and one of those tours every year is granted to the AWA. Only 20 people get to go and I was lucky enough to have my name drawn in the lottery. So, this morning I drove to eastern Jakarta and toured the factory.

This one factory employs between 5,500-10,000 employees depending on the production demands and, if I'm remembering correctly, ships up to 1,000,000 Barbies/week. The factory only has an export license so all of the dolls have to be shipped out of the country and then imported back before they can be sold in Indonesian stores (stupid, I know). The place was immense, as you'd expect. And just thinking about the organization of producing all these little parts was mind boggling, even to my Virgo self. What I was most astonished by was how much hand work is involved in each doll. Every outfit is sewed by a woman on a sewing machine and all the hair is stitched on by a woman on a sewing machine. Then there are the "groomers", the women (I keep saying "woman" because over 80% of the production crew are women) who actually brush her hair, braid it or tie it up, and put on the hat or crown or sunglasses or whatever accessory she's shown with. Then there are the painters, the women who paint on the make-up by using a cut-out face mask over the face and running the face under a paint sprayer. And finally at the end there were the women who hand fixed the dolls to the packaging. It was incredible. I just assumed most of the work was done by machines, but instead so much of it is by hand. They say that producing one Barbie takes 3 minutes of actual work, and from design phase (headquarters are in California where all the Barbies are designed) to engineering to finished product takes about 1 month.

In the factory there was a huge map of Indonesia with a Barbie doll affixed to every part of the country. Each doll was dressed in clothes that were typical of that part of the country. It was quite cool. But the only Indonesian Barbie they sell is the Sumatra Barbie. It was definitely not the most interesting one though. The Barbies now wear underwear (I really don't know why, they don't have bras on and its not like they used to be anatomically correct) and their size proportions are much more realistic. She now looks like a shapely but fit young woman. If you remember, the first dolls, which debuted in 1959, had measurements that were nearly impossible.

And after the tour they fed us lunch and gave us a Barbie doll!!! I have to admit that the little girl in me is thrilled. I haven't owned a Barbie doll in like 20+ years and with having 2 sons I assumed I'd never have any girlie things in my house. But here I am with a Princess Barbie! Well, C has a Princess Barbie. I of course gave it to him and he loves it. My wonderful little boy loves his Barbie doll. I couldn't be happier! Of course he laughed like crazy when I took her gown off and she was naked. But I'll take it. And now she's taking a bath with him (all I could think about was that her beautiful ringlets were going to be ruined! I guess I'm still such a girl inside).

Christmas and such

Santa came early this year, carrying a big bag o' presents. Since we're leaving Saturday for our grand adventure in New Zealand, we asked Santa to deliver most of the presents last weekend. Especially the big ones. Like C's new Batman Bike! It was a huge hit as expected. He is racing around the complex, feeling the wind in his hair, showing off to the girls... He really was in need of a new bike too. He had outgrown his tricycle and I felt a little bad watching his little legs peddling furiously as he tried to keep up with the big kids (and even kids his own age). Now he has a bike that is a little on the big side and has an adjustable seat, so it should last a while. LC didn't score nearly as big in the Christmas windfall. He has all of C's baby toys and doesn't know the difference anyway.

Christmas is more visible here than I had expected. There is Christmas music playing in the malls, decorations adorning shop windows, plenty of ornaments and fake Christmas trees. Thankfully it isn't overkill though; it doesn't make me want to throw up from all the dripping tinsel and jingle bells. It would be awfully silly if it were overdone anyway; it's already a little odd to see Christmas decorations in a Muslim country in the tropics.

In other news, C is really turning into a little boy. He has entered the "poopey head" phase. Evidently it is HILARIOUS! All of a sudden he will yell out, "poop!", and burst out laughing. He and his friends amuse each other endlessly yelling out different phrases with the word "poop" in it. I read that this is a healthy phase because they are developing their sense of humor, so I waver between laughing along or ignoring it depending on my mood. What I don't tolerate is the screaming. Agh. It's amazing how loud one 3 year old can be, and especially a group of them! He also seems to have a harder and harder time listening. We will repeatedly tell him no to something and he will do it anyway. The time-outs are returning with increased frequency lately, and we're getting quite sick of it. I'm bracing myself for the likelihood that this will last a while.

As for LC, he is entering into one of my all time favorite ages. I feel that for the first 6 months a parent is making a deposit on the fun and wonder that comes in the next 6 months. LC is rolling over more and more often. He is always quite happy with himself when he does it, until he realizes he's stuck on his belly. He is laughing more easily now as well. His father is particularly good at making him laugh and smile and he has a wonderful full giggly laugh that is totally addictive. He is sleeping better too most nights. He has slept through the night or straight through until 4 or 5 a number of times in the last week or two. There are 2 main problems though (there is always something, isn't there?). He wakes up too early. Sometimes he doesn't go back to sleep if he wakes up at 5, and he almost never goes back to sleep if he wakes up at 5:30. If we make it until 6 I feel fortunate. I think it's crazy for a 5 month old to wake up so early, but maybe it's common. The other problem is his sleep has become totally random. One night he'll sleep through the night, and the next he'll wake up 5 times. I rack my brain trying to figure out why, but I can never come up with a consistent reason. It's maddening. And of course now that he's rolling over more he's probably going to sleep poorly again. Plus we're going on a major trip that, based on our Bali trip experience, is going to totally mess him up again. I just pray it doesn't take us 5 weeks to get back on track!

What other bits of randomness can I tell you... Work is in the lull before the storm I think. January is certain to be crazy and I expect I'll have to work close to full time. It looks like I'm going to have to open a project office, manage it, hire employees, and both do and oversee the technical work for the project to be up and running in March, all on 50% time. It makes my belly flip over just thinking about it. So let's move on to...

Our vacation to New Zealand in 4 days! (I'm going to ignore the fact that we're quite unprepared for this). I can't wait for the majestic views, cooler temps and fresh air! We're spending 4 days in Queenstown, 4 days in Christchurch (one of which will be seeing my uncle who now lives nearby), 2 days in Auckland and 4 days with my Aussie host parents (from when I was an exchange student in high school) on this island west of Auckland. I think it's a good itinerary, except for the 2 kid factor. We may be a bit insane to do this; I hope we don't end up having a miserable time... This of course depends on LC and how well he sleeps for us and how hard of a time he gives us about his naps. Having a nanny is great for so many reasons, but the down side is that he's accustomed to only sleeping in his crib and won't sleep easily in the car or stroller. Let's hope he learns how quickly on this trip! When we planned it we knew it could be very challenging. But, we've never been to Asia before and we have a lot to see in this part of the world. So, we need to start before we run out of time.

So, I'll have lots to talk about in the new year, and hopefully I will have time to write. Here's wishing you all happy holidays, safe travels, good gifts, much merry making, and warm toes!

Happy December

I was going to wait until Christmas to post this photo, but I really can't wait. I mean, come on! can my son be ANY CUTER?! It feels like cruel and unusual punishment to deny you the joy of this photo for any length of time (yes, I know I'm such a modest mom). Plus, I'm hoping during our two Christmas celebrations we'll snap a couple more gems. Enjoy!

Nights of hell

LC rolled over 2 days ago! And I had just left the room not 5 seconds before it happened. He hasn't repeated his performance, despite our efforts, but I'm sure they will happen with increased frequency. He even rolled over from his back to his front, which is harder to do. Such a strong kid.

Perhaps this new developmental stage can explain the horrible nights LC has given us over the past several weeks. Fortunately they have improved dramatically this past week, but there was one week recently that was even worse than when he was a newborn. For about 3 nights in a row I was awake from about 2-5 every morning, and J had it almost as bad. LC kept waking up, wouldn't go back to sleep easily, waking up early and thinking it was time to get up, you name it we had it. So I'm not sure if it was due to the upcoming rolling over breakthrough, or the vaccinations he got, or a possible allergy to cow's milk, or to him just being a pain in the a**. I took him to the doctor last week to find out if there was anything medically wrong with him, like an ear infection, etc. The doctor took a stool and urine sample as well and discovered that he doesn't process fat well. I have long suspected that he doesn't tolerate dairy well, so I have limited my diet of cheese, milk, ice cream, etc. since he was just a couple weeks old. We have been giving him one bottle of formula for some time now, and didn't notice anything dramatically different when we started (except for some constipation issues if you want to know the details...). We've now switched him to soy milk formula but aren't sure if the improvements in sleeping are due to this change or to getting over the effects from the vaccinations or because our many threats to send him out with the trash finally sunk in. In any case, god willing his sleep will continue to improve and we will be a happier household.


On a side note, we found a wonderful doctor. And she's close! I was taking the kids to a pediatrician who was relatively nearby. However, after twice having to wait over 1 hour for our scheduled appointment I switched over to a family doctor in a new clinic just down the road. And she is wonderful! I can call the day of, get a scheduled appointment, and am seeing her at the appointed time. I love having a family doctor who knows the whole family, etc. She is very thorough and takes her time. And she calls within 1 week of the visit to check on the patient! Can you believe it?

Some photos from today and this past Saturday. C's school put on a charity bazaar/open house event that was actually really nice. They had all sorts of little games, face painting, and Santa Clause. So, for the first time in C's life he was willing to sit on Santa's lap. Right here in Muslim Indonesia!

The hungry boy and other randomness

We have moved on to a next stage in LC's little life. He started rice cereal 3 days ago and is already eating everything we offer him. I wasn't planning to start him on solids until he was 6 months old. I remember that it's a bit of a pain and I wasn't in any hurry. But then it finally dawned on me that perhaps the reason he kept waking up between going to bed and his 10 pm bottle was because he was still hungry. Actually, it was this and realizing the only time he is cranky after nursing (he's usually happy as a clam and starts chatting away) is after his 6 pm feed, so maybe it's because he's still hungry. Ah ha! DUH! So we'll see how it goes. The last couple nights he's only woken briefly so it may be the trick. I wish I had thought of this when J left for the US; it may have saved me many nights of hell and exhaustion...

C and I got flu shots today. It's the first shot C has had since this time last year. It's a different story when he's so much more cognizant of what's going on around him. He did a good job though. Sort of. He started crying before the needle even touched him, cried through it, and then promptly stopped when it was over. I've been sick 3 times since moving to Jakarta, so I feel like I need all the help I can get to stay well. I seem to pick up everything that C brings home from school. My defenses are always so weak when I'm run down, from being pregnant and now sleep deprived. Plus, we need to protect LC from getting anything bad.

J came home yesterday afternoon and we are all thrilled to have him back. And C waited a whole 2 minutes before he asked for his presents. I can't really blame him...J did come home baring some great gifts! Just one of his bags weighed 67 lbs, so you get the idea why it felt like an early Christmas. Some of the gifts for C are for Christmas, but he got a few right away (including batman matchbox cars - this boy is still crazy about his cars. He has so many and yet he never tires of more) so he's been busy playing with those and carrying them around with him everywhere he goes. Speaking of which, what is that?? Why do all toddlers and preschoolers like to carry bags and their favorite toys du jour everywhere they go? Anyway, so we are still basking in the glory of having our family complete again, although J is very jet lagged and was in bed by 9 tonight, which isn't bad actually. It is a very long way to come.

November update

Just before LC's 5 month birthday, and he weighs in at 18 lbs. He's not rolling over yet, probably due to all the fat he has to move! But he's getting there and I expect he'll start doing it soon. He loves playing with his toys and is now getting mad at us if we take them away. His favorite toys are a vibrating butterfly that his nana gave him, a different butterfly that was also one of C's favorites, and really anything that he can hold and put in his mouth. He likes his bouncy seat although he's getting too big for it, likes his gymini and mobile. And now he's been introduced to the exersaucer and it's a big hit!



I think he's a pretty textbook kind of kid - generally happy and smiley but fussy when he wants something. He's given us a few wakeless nights and we pray that they become more and more common. Of course his dad managed to miss the worst of it. He left for a business trip to the US about 1 week after we moved into our new house. Well, all the changes with the Bali trip and the new house didn't sit so well with LC, and he turned into a Terrible Sleeper. It was a solid week or so of hell. New house with boxes unpacked, me squeezing in work whenever I could, and a very wakeful and screaming baby. All on my own. Thanks dear. Fortunately he's on the mend though and his dad returns soon. Just as things are calming down, of course.

C started swimming lessons yesterday, finally. It's something I've wanted to do for him since we moved here, and it's finally happening. All of his 3 year old friends can swim fairly independently, and so C has a long way to go. I don't like living in a place with so many swimming pools and C not being able to swim. I like that the swim instructor teaches them (or tries to anyway) how to turn around and swim to the side in case they were to fall in. Drowning is the second leading cause of unintentional injury-related death in the US, so I'm not totally paranoid. I'm going to start LC in early '08, so he grows up knowing how to swim.

Below is C in a bajaj. It's basically a shell around a motorcycle, and I think you find them all over Asia (this website says you find them in Africa too, but I don't remember ever seeing them there). C loves them! On the rare occasion when our car isn't available to pick up C from school, the nanny will go get him and bring him back in one of these. It costs like $1 for the trip and he he has such a good time. Of course, here I am rambling before about injury prevention, and I'm letting my son ride in one of these death traps. Oops. I guess that's where the silver lining in the constant Jakarta traffic can be found. He'd never pick up enough speed to experience much damage.

Worker bee

I haven’t really spent any time telling you about the work I’m doing here in Indo. Until last month there wasn’t a whole lot to tell as the amount of work I was doing was pretty minimal and only mildly interesting. However, as of 3 weeks ago my workload has been bumped up to half-time and has become much more intense. On one hand I am struggling to keep it to 50% because I could be doing this full time right now, but on the other hand I’m doing this largely from home and with 2 little kids in the house it’s proving to be very challenging to find the time. Plus, I don’t even have to be working right now. There are other things I want to be doing and I have to readjust my state of mind and schedules to find the right balance.

The work is very interesting though, and important. As some of you may know, more cases of human Avian Influenza (bird flu) have occurred in Indonesia (113 to date) than anywhere else. Because of this and the great fear around the world of this disease becoming either efficiently transmitted from bird to human, or even worse from human to human, the US government (and others) is pouring quite a bit of money and resources into learning about the disease and containing it. This is where I come in. USAID has a contract with my company to procure various drugs and supplies to donate to developing countries. In 2006 they decided to send some decontamination kits and personal protective equipment to Indo to help protect investigators when they go out to investigate an outbreak among birds. So for the last several months I have been doing a little work to help bring those supplies into Indo and track their use and reorder when necessary.

Now, however, the US government has decided that vaccinating chickens against bird flu may help reduce the viral load in chickens and therefore help contain the disease. Well, there are 3 million chickens born every day in Indo. There are 17,000 islands in Indo. Complicated and overwhelming task? Yes! So, my project has been asked to procure the vaccines and get them down to the district level. They are only doing this in 6-8 districts in West Java, where 60% of the chickens are, so that makes things easier. I don’t think they realistically believe all chickens in Indo will ever be vaccinated. We can’t even get all children in Indo vaccinated, much less chickens! This task is further complicated by the fact that vaccines have to be stored at a certain cold temperature (4-8 degrees Celsius in this case) until they are used. This is a huge task in a tropical climate and developing country where electricity is not always ensured nor working refrigerators present in all locations. Therefore, we have to figure out how we’re going to get it there under the right conditions (cold chain logistics). Another complication to this already daunting task is the fact they don’t have a really efficacious vaccine. There are vaccines (for chickens, not for humans) and they work against some strains, but not against others. Being influenza, the virus is always mutating, so the powers that be will continuously have to monitor the ever changing virus strains (just like you have to get a new flu vaccine every year).

And seeing as I’m the only project employee living here, I will be doing much of the work dealing with the logistics of vaccinating a whole pant load of chickens. Plus I’m on a huge learning curve here. I do not know much about vaccines or chickens or cold chain logistics! It feels overwhelming, especially since this came as a huge surprise. Three weeks ago I had no idea I’d be thrown into this. I was going on my merry way thinking that come March or so I’d start drumming up some more work. And now I’ve got more than expected. Fortunately I'm working with some really great people who are doing other components of the work required to get this thing off the ground.

There are other things that have been added to my workload as well. Like organizing a workshop for the government's bird flu committee on emergency preparedness. Again, what? Zoinks scoob...

It’s exciting to be doing this work though. It’s an emerging disease and I’m living in the epicenter. I imagine I’ll gain a lot of expertise and will be at the forefront of what’s being done to combat it. The drawback though is that it’s taking me farther and farther away from my true passion of maternal and child health. That is what I got my master’s degree in, and yet my career so far has been related but not directly linked. But I do like it and it’s a good deal for me right now, and it’s certainly exciting!

Moving on...over

In addition to the many things that happened in October, we moved into a new house. It's something we had been considering for a little while, and finally we got around to talking to our realtor about it. Well, the first people to see it loved it (which made us reconsider, of course). The following few weeks was a roller coaster. There were several complications to our moving, including the 2 year lease we signed when we moved in (very common here), the requirement that we could secure our new house at the same time we finalized the sublease, the landlady agreeing to the special considerations that must be given to the new tenants as Belgian embassy staff, the new tenants' willingness to not have much done to the house as a condition of their move, and the timing of moving around idil fitri and our trip to Bali. One day it looked like we'd move, and the next it wouldn't. Well, the day before we left for Bali it all came together, and we moved 3 days after we got back.

Why, you may ask, did we go through all this pain and agony? At the time we wondered that ourselves. But now that we've moved we feel we were right in doing so. One of the main reasons was that the motorcycle noise was annoying us, and it was on the kids' side of the house and we worried about it waking them up. The last thing J wanted to hear after spending 1 hour in Jakarta traffic to get home was the sound of the ever present motorcycles. A big reason for me to move was the constant mosquito problem in the house. It was an older house and not well sealed, and no matter what we did there were always lots of mosquitoes in the house. We had to have it sprayed once/month to try to get rid of them, and god knows what those chemicals might do to our young kids. Then again, I also didn't want them to get dengue fever or malaria. In addition to these big reasons, there were many other minor inconveniences that all added up to a desire to move.

Our new house is in a complex of about 35 houses, just a few blocks away from our old house. There are 3 playgrounds (very sparse in Jakarta) and lots of children. C is able to ride his bike on the streets and take walks without inhaling exhaust fume and dodging motorcycles. He has already met several of the neighborhood kids, one of whom is an older girl. That's right, C is charming a sweet 7 year old down the street. We'll definitely keep our eye on him when he hits puberty! The house is much more conducive to family living and the management company is amazing. And while the mosque's call to prayer is actually louder here, there is NO motorcycle noise! We've given up the grandness of our other house, an incredibly gorgeous yard, and more exposure to Indonesian culture, but we think we made the right decision.

I have lots of reasons why I haven't been blogging in so many weeks, the move being just one of them. I'll try to get to all the other reasons soon.

Halloween

Happy Halloween!

Super C to the rescue! That is, unless he's at school for the Halloween party... Once again, C decides to not wear a costume. It has been an ongoing refusal, but I thought we had finally broken through whatever anti-costume feelings he had. This time last year he refused to don his cowboy costume at school or for trick-or-treating. Then at his end-of-year concert he refused to wear the costume. But this year he has been wearing his superman costume in the house and wore it to the Halloween party with his playgroup. So, I thought we were over this, whatever this is. But no. This morning at school he got as far as putting the shirt on before he decided against it and demanded it to be taken off. Despite my and the teacher's attempts at convincing him otherwise, he celebrated the Halloween party in his street clothes. Ah well, I guess I'll save money and energy in not having to get a costume for him every year...

In the meantime, again

Too busy to post, and yet I have so much to say, so much catching up... And the list keeps growing which makes finding the time to update you all on our activities even more challenging. In the meantime, here is a photo taken yesterday. I don't want you to think I've forgotten about you all...

Tummy time squared

Bali sunset

Ahhh Bali...what's not to love?

Spudlyness confirmed

It is confirmed that LC is a spud. I checked C's baby book and he weighed 15 lb 8 oz at his 6 month visit. LC weighed the exact same at his 12 week visit. Definitely spudly.

J's parents arrived safely on Saturday and weren't even too exhausted. They have been busy, busy getting their fill of grandsons. C isn't giving them much of a break and I suspect they will be ready for a vacation after their vacation. Both boys are trying their darnedest to charm the pants off of their grandparents and I'm pretty sure they're both smitten for good. Of course, I can't blame them.

The cheeky pair

Photos of my cheeky monkeys. The kid in the punchbowl is C when he was 6 months old. The other photo is of LC taken just today, at 13 weeks. They are wearing the same shirt, and you can tell that LC isn't going to fit in it much longer. The shirt is for 3-6 month old babies, and yet he's going to outgrow many of these clothes in a matter of a few weeks. He's such a spud. But a very cute spud.

Very cool website

So a friend of mine passed this on to me because she thought it was "so up my alley". Well, she's very right. This is a great idea for both giving and receiving gifts. If you're like me, at this point in your lives there's little that we need or want that fits in that gift giving price range or that you couldn't buy for yourself. So, what better way to avoid just accumulating more "stuff" - how about having that money go to a worthy cause instead?!

Check it out, especially when considering Christmas or Hanukah gifts this year.

Ramadan revisited

We are one week into the Islamic holy fasting month of Ramadan, when Muslims refrain from eating and drinking between sunrise and sunset. They therefore have to wake early to pray, eat and drink before the sun rises, and then wait 12 hours before they can even drink a glass of water again. Frankly I don't know how they do it. They tell me that they are so used to fasting one month every year since childhood that it isn't as great a hardship as we'd imagine. Although, I have noticed they are VERY eager to drink and eat as soon as the mosque announces that it is time at the end of the day.

The first night of Ramadan we were awoken at 2 a.m. by drumming coming from the street in front of our house. Fortunately we were warned this would happen. Evidently people came around drumming the first few nights to help wake people up in time to cook, eat, drink, and pray. We were quite worried because we find this neighborhood to be pretty noisy, and were afraid the drumming would be intolerably loud and would go on and on. We're already being woken up enough with an infant in the house, we don't need any more disturbances! Fortunately, even though the drumming woke us up, it didn't keep us up and honestly the sound of drumming reminded me of Mali. On a side note, why they would need to get up almost 4 hours early is beyond me. I don't know when they sleep!

The only other time I've lived in a country where Ramadan was widely observed was in Mali. However, I don't remember the routines changing as drastically as here. I suppose they got up earlier, but I remember hearing women preparing breakfast at horribly early hours all year long. And there certainly wasn't any drumming at 2 a.m. to wake the village up. Perhaps since rural life tends to wake and sleep according to the sun anyway, the month of Ramadan doesn't alter the schedule as much.

Other than hearing the mosque announcements more often, the drumming and a slight disruption to our evening routine, it has affected us very little. Most of the restaurants are still open for lunch, school is in session, etc. My mother will likely remember her experience in Mali riding the bus back from Mopti when the bus driver didn't want to stop for lunch because everyone on the bus was fasting. I became a typically rude American and demanded that we stop, pointing out that not everyone on the bus was Muslim. If I remember correctly it took some convincing though, and it was at a point in my experience when my tolerance level was at a low point. And plus, we were hungry! My husband will attest to the fact that I become quite crabby when I'm hungry. In any case, I suppose that might happen here as well. I don't know. I won't be taking any long bus rides any time soon.

Eid ul-Fitr marks the end of the month of Ramadan, which will happen in mid-October. This is a very important holiday when everyone who is able will go to their home villages to be with their families. The holiday is celebrated with festivities and lots of eating and drinking throughout the day. It's like Christmas and Thanksgiving rolled into one. From what I hear Jakarta will become like a ghost town. In some ways it would be a good time to be here. The streets will be empty and the town quiet. This year we won't be here though. We are escaping with J's parents (who arrive in only 6 days!) to the mostly Hindu island of Bali.

I really enjoyed this holiday while living in Mali. Everyone was joyful throughout the day, there was lots of music and conversation and good food. I roamed throughout my village visiting my friends and eating with them. Everyone donned their best outfits and gifts were shared. There was a big celebration with drumming, kora playing (similar to a guitar), and dancing. People from the surrounding small villages and compounds came for the celebration. I know that our Indonesian friends are looking forward to this holiday just as our Malian friends did.

I don't know how much blogging I'll be doing during the coming month. As I mentioned, J's parents arrive next Saturday and we'll be in Bali for 10 days of their stay. I imagine we'll be pretty busy so I'm not sure I'll be posting too much before November (not that I've been blogging all that much lately anyway...).

Fun guys

Orphanages

The last couple weeks have been filled with getting involved and rekindling old friendships. It feels good to get out of the house more and to start doing some of the things I've been wanting to do since before even coming to Indonesia. And an added bonus? More interesting things to write about! I'm still tired, but LC is having more good nights than bad nights so my energy level is improving. And my to-do list is still unbearably long, but I'm whittling away at it little by little.

Last week I was able to catch up with an old friend. When I was in high school I was an exchange student in Australia for one year. The program (AFS) organized us into groups so that we'd have a group of other exchange students with whom we could share experiences and lean on. There were 7 of us in my group: a Venezuelan, Japanese, Thai, Italian, French Canadian, Dane, and me. I've kept in touch with a few of them, have visited a couple of them (in Caracas and Montreal and Milan) and been visited by a couple of them (Venezuelan and Japanese). My Japanese friend now lives in Bangkok and had to come to Jakarta last week for business. She generously braved the Jakarta traffic to come to dinner at our home, meet J and take a peek at my sleeping boys. It was great to catch up with her and hear about her family and her life now. Thailand is very high on my list of places to visit so I'm sure I'll be seeing her again in Thailand.

Last week I also attended a meeting of the American Women's Association (AWA) Social Welfare Committee. This group grants money to different social causes in and around Jakarta. For example, they give money to several orphanages, provide scholarships for children to go to school (public school here is not entirely free - you have to pay for school uniforms, workbooks, pens, school fees, etc.), give money to mentally and physically disabled homes for adults and children, etc. Some of these places receive money from the government, but of course it's never enough. And some of them are started by generous and philanthropic individuals or churches (I'm not aware of us working with any mosques but we may) to meet the needs of their communities. To help them make ends meet these places make an application to the AWA, for example, which is reviewed by the committee and funds are awarded (or not). The committee gets its money from membership fees and the majority from corporate donations. It was a very interesting meeting and I'm excited to become part of this group of women who are doing some really wonderful things in the communities.

Part of the committee's responsibility is to visit the group that has submitted an application for a grant, and to make follow-up visits to ensure that the money is being used for the stated purposes. This morning I went with a group of women to visit an orphanage and home for pregnant women in Bogor. This place was started by an Australian woman (doctor I think) and doesn't receive any government funds because it is Christian (I asked if it is the same for Muslim sponsored places but they didn't know the answer - I suspect not). The pregnant women are single or married women who do not feel comfortable or safe remaining with their families. There were 4 women there at the time. While staying in the home they are taught a skill like knitting, and while they are there they make various crafts that are sold in the community or at bazaars.

The orphanage had about 8 children under 1, another 15 1-4 year olds, and about 10 preschoolers/kindergartners. They teach the older children themselves in the orphanage because its actually cheaper to hire a teacher than to pay school fees and related costs for all of the children. Many of the children in the orphanage are not actually up for adoption. This is quite common in Indonesia and in many other countries. The families bring the child to the orphanage because they can't afford to keep them at that time, but hope to be able to afford to later in their life. And families do sometimes take their children back when their financial situation improves. But other times not. And unfortunately some families only take the children back when they're old enough to work. I suppose in most cases this is fine because realistically not all the children would be adopted anyway. However, I hate to think that there might be children out there who are desired by other families but their biological families have them on "reserve" until they're old enough to work. I also heard that it's difficult to adopt a girl from a Christian orphanage because there aren't enough up for adoption (they're in higher demand). You can only adopt a child from an orphanage of your religion, so a Muslim can only adopt a Muslim child, and a Christian can only adopt a Christian child.

The place I visited was quite well run and evidently one of the nicest ones I will see. It was very clean and the children had their own beds and it was spacious enough. There are about 20 staff so the staff don't seem too overwhelmed, although they welcome volunteers. The toddlers seemed to have quite a few toys to play with and they were reading books when we came. There was a backyard and it was in a very quiet, nice neighborhood. And most importantly, the children seemed happy and the staff very loving. It was nice to learn that the vision in my head of what orphanages must be like is not always true, and that sometimes the children are actually in a better situation in an orphanage than they would be in a home. However, I know they aren't all as nice as this one and that there are others I will see that will break my heart.

Correction

A couple quick corrections about the elections. It was actually for the governor of Jakarta, but for we Americans we would use "mayor". Also, the man who won used to be the vice-governor of Jakarta, not the vice-president of Indonesia. This is therefore a step forwards for him, and makes a lot more sense to us. Just another good example of the challenges of communicating across different languages...

Holidays abound

Apparently we've moved to the land of holidays. It seems like there's a holiday every other week (that's not actually the case, but it does seem that way). We've had 3 holidays in the last 2 weeks: Jakarta mayoral elections, a religious holiday, and Independence Day.

The mayoral elections went smoothly, as far as I have heard. There were demonstrations and marches in the weeks leading up to the election, but nothing too contentious. The streets were quiet the day of and nobody expected there to be any problems. We saw a couple polling places in our neighborhood, so I have the impression that there were numerous polling stations and they were easy to get to. And notice - it was a holiday! People could go and vote and many did not have to take off of work to do it. What a concept! I think it is ridiculous that we don't do the same in the US, not even for the presidential election. I'm sure our economy can survive if we add another holiday every 4 years. So the winner of the election, with an easy win I believe, was the former vice-president of Indonesia. J and I thought this would be a step down, but evidently not. Maybe the vice-president of Indonesia has even less power than the vp of the US, and governing Jakarta is like governing New York City.

The religious holiday was a Muslim holiday. Most of them are; however, there is also a Hindu holiday and a Christian holiday. There is a holiday for the new year, and a holiday for the Chinese new year. Indonesia is predominantly Muslim, but it seems pretty smart and progressive to honor other religions and other traditions. We hear the call to prayer a few times per day and there are many mosques, but otherwise it isn't readily apparent that just about everyone is Muslim. I also expected that I would always need to wear long pants or skirts and shirts with sleeves on them, but this does not seem to be necessary here in Jakarta. Matter of fact, we have been shocked at the tiny short shorts we have seen women wearing in the shopping malls. We'll see how things change when Ramadan starts in a few weeks, but for the most part the fact that this is a predominantly Muslim society isn't prominent in every day life. I imagine outside of Jakarta this would be different...

Last Friday was Independence Day. My understanding is that celebrations are very neighborhood centered. There were decorations everywhere (red and white flags) and evidently there was a parade and games in the kampung (neighborhood) near our house. We didn't know what time the festivities took place (nobody seemed to know the day before) so unfortunately we didn't observe the celebrations. From what I heard though the festivities mostly consisted of games for older kids and adults, and it doesn't sound like we missed out on a lot. But it would have been interesting to see. It made me miss our own Independence Day. I'm sure we would have taken C to a parade and had a bbq with our friends. That would have been nice...

Jakarta becomes noticeably quieter on these long weekends. Many of our friends get out of Jakarta, and many Indonesians as well. The roads are less congested and it is wonderfully quieter in the city. Once LC is older we'll start to get out of Jakarta for these long weekends as well, although it's also nice and relaxing to stay here when the whole city vamps down a notch.

Regression City, Indonesia

Last week had a tough beginning thanks to the two young boys of the household. Going back to school had quite an effect on C, and not a very good one it turns out, at least not in the short term. His first day back at school saw two potty accidents and three visits to our room during the night. The boy hasn't had an accident since the first week he was potty trained in May, and yet in this one day he had two. Then that night he woke up three times and came into our room. He wasn't up long, but these disturbances plus LC waking up was a double whammy. When parents say that having two children isn't just twice as hard but exponentially harder, I think they had this sort of night in mind. The following day was a repeat - two more accidents. Plus we're trying to get him potty trained for number two, but to no avail. Instead I'm incredibly frustrated and he's gotten a couple time-outs for outright lying to me about it. So we're just going to put that one on hold, again.

Plus there's LC. I should not have said he was sleeping better because all I did was jinx myself. The glorious 6-7 hour stretches of sleep were short-lived, and he is back to 3-4 hour stretches. Actually make that 1-4 hour stretches, because as the night progresses his sleeping abilities decrease dramatically. It's like 5:00 - 7:00 just sucks all around, whether it's in the morning or evening. By the end of the day I think he's just so tired that he's generally cranky, and I guess in the morning he has almost had enough sleep but not quite, and is cranky then too. I'm pretty ready for the night time routine to get better. This is getting old.

The good news though is that LC has started smiling for real. It's such a wonderful development and pretty much makes up for the lack of sleep. He's got a full-on toothy grin and his eyes totally light up. Add the smiles to his wonderful coos and it's pure joy! Right now he's singing all kinds of songs and it really is heavenly!

And C is having fun at school. I love that he can give me a full report now of the fun things he is doing there. He seems to be adapting quickly to his new teacher and new classroom. He is excited about school at the end of the morning.

I realize my posts of late have been really boring. I'm even bored writing them. Understandably, however, my days are very wrapped up with my children and there is little else going on right now. Plus, I just don't have the time or energy to write about much else, or to even write my posts well. I apologize. I will try to make my next post a bit more interesting, or at least on a topic other than my children...

All is fine

The earthquake off Java occurred shortly after midnight on Thursday and measured 7 on the Richter scale. It was felt in Jakarta, even by people living in our area of town. There was some destruction in Jakarta but no injuries have been reported. We didn't feel a thing and didn't know about it until we looked at the news the next morning. For those of you who might have seen the headline and worried, we're all just fine.

Such a big boy

My eldest son officially started preschool today, and last week he turned 3. I can't believe it. His new developments and accomplishments amaze me daily, and I am so proud of the boy he is becoming. He is so sweet and affectionate, a behavior for which I can't quite tell you how grateful I am. I love his uncoordinated hugs and sloppy kisses! And somewhere along the line he picked up the phrase, "you're the best mommy in the whole world", which he says daily and I eat it up every time. His memory also amazes us. He has memorized many of his books and will read to us rather than us reading to him. He will remember small things from our adventures and J and I will look at each other as if to say, how on earth does he remember that?! He is a total chatterbox. He will talk forever, saying the funniest things. This morning when we passed the mosque he explained to me how the men go inside the mosque to pray. They pray that the mosquitoes will be nice to him and not bite him. I love the things that he says!


He shares very well with other kids (most of the time) and enjoys playing with other children in a small group setting or one-to-one. Big groups and new experiences are somewhat daunting to him, but he quickly eases into it and then totally embraces it. Case in point was this morning: he went back to school this morning and started in a new class, the preschool room. He stood outside the class for several minutes, too shy to go in. However, once I pointed out the big digger to him, he ran inside and started chatting away, playing with the toys, showing the teacher his new shirt, etc. I was even able to say goodbye much earlier than I expected.


We had a really good time at his birthday party. Most of the kids and moms from our playgroup came, so there were 10 kids and 10 moms at the party. It was mayhem. But fun mayhem! We played a couple games and we got him a Lightening McQueen birthday cake. Everyone seemed to have fun, and it was his first birthday where he really seemed to understand what was going on and was really excited about his birthday. Thanks to all the gifts from friends, from us, and the packages arriving in the mail from grandparents and friends back home, he opened presents for 4 days straight. I'm afraid he may think this is normal... All in all it was a very successful day (exhausting for mom, but worth it) and now C is 3!

C and LC on C's birthday



Birthday cake


And my LC is growing well. He has started sleeping better and will sleep for 6-7 hours for the first stretch of the night. I hope this will stick and that the second stretch of time during the night will also get longer. I'm still getting up 2x/night, but at least I can get a longer stretch of sleep to begin with. I think his first smile is around the corner. I've seen some smiles already, but don't think they're quite the real thing yet. He's also started cooing more often, and the sound is beautiful!

Now that C is back at school and LC is starting to sleep better, I feel like I can really start settling in here. I have started going to a yoga class and will join a gym in the next month, and I hope to start C at swimming lessons and start myself at golf lessons in the near future. I hope to become more involved at the American Women's Association, and basically just start doing all the things that I've put off. And at some point I'd like to start doing a bit more work on some of my company's other projects here. Life will get busier, but in a good way.

In the meantime

A couple photos to keep the regulars happy...

No time for blogging

Between the kids, naps and the new Harry Potter book, I have little time for much else I'm afraid. Not much to write about anyway. My days are filled with baby, baby, baby and sneaking in sleep and rest and meals when I can. I keep hoping that LC will fall into a routine but his naps are so hit or miss. Getting him to sleep isn't that difficult, it's getting him to stay asleep that's the problem!

One interesting note on Harry Potter, I was surprised how greatly Jakarta bookstores jumped on the Harry hoopla. Some stores were open all night so as to start selling the book at midnight, others opened early, and all seemed to have some activity opening day (Harry Potter dress-up, crafts, etc.). The book they sell here is smaller than the size that is sold in the US. Don't know why...

Anyway, so I may not resurface again until I've finished the book.

Home, Sweet Home

I wasn’t sure coming back to Jakarta would ever feel so good (we came back last Friday). Especially when leaving the clean air, beautiful parks, great restaurants, and amazing efficiency that is Singapore. But it does feel so good to be home. We have our baby things now, we have help again, C has people other than his boring parents to play with, we have friends to hang out with, and we have space to spread out. I’m sure within a matter of a few weeks Jakarta will start to annoy us again, but for right now it feels great. And as we drove back from the airport, back onto our street where there were small children riding their bikes and men pushing carts selling nasi goreng and neighborhood guards chatting to eachother, I knew that this is a better place to be than Singapore. Jakarta is oh so much more colorful and interesting.

Then again, I’ve been thinking a lot about home. I’ve spent enough time living very far away from home to know about homesickness. What has surprised me this time around is that it has snuck up on me sooner than I expected. The reason, I believe, can mostly be found in my 2 wonderful sons. They have a fantastic family back home and they are missing quality time with them. We lived within walking distance of some of our best friends who also had children C’s age, and I so miss walking to the neighborhood park to meet them or sitting on our back patio having a bbq while the kids played in the back yard. And I have good friends back home who have just had their second babies or will soon, and I can’t believe that I probably won’t meet them and vice versa until LC is 1.5 years old. Sometimes I have asked myself if we were crazy to leave all that we had. And sometimes it feels that we were. But not for long, because I know that we are fulfilling a dream to live overseas and we would never be content until we realized that dream. I know that the experience our boys are having here will open up their worlds like nothing else can, and I believe they will be the richer and more wonderful for it. I know that career-wise it was a good move for both of us, especially J. I know that our friends and family still love us and that won’t stop no matter where we are. But, it is still hard at times to be away, to know the things that we are missing and what our boys are missing.

For now though, I’m going to focus on the fact that this feels like home, this place half way across the world in a tropical climate full of exotic food and dengue fever. And that before I know it this experience will be over and I don’t want to regret spending too much time thinking of my American home.

2 weeks and still smiling

LC is 2 weeks old today! He and his brother have been keeping us busy, to say the least. Our lives have become the Grand Juggling Act, as we try to keep up with their varying needs, with my sleep, with J's work... Singapore has some wonderful conveniences and is a great break from Jakarta, but we are looking forward to getting home where we have all of our baby stuff, some help, and where J can focus on work.

So far LC seems like a pretty easy going kid. He rarely cries and when he does it's pretty easy to figure out the problem. He is still sleeping a lot, but is also eating a lot - I am already looking forward to longer stretches of sleep and a little more predictability. He is also a Grunter, and as such I have nicknamed him Sir Grunts A lot. What this is about we're not quite sure, but our best guess is his ploy to get held as this seems to be the best way to quiet the ruckus.

I am definitely tired, but I don't feel as tired as I remember being after I had C. You would think I'd be more tired with trying to keep up with a toddler as well. Perhaps my body and mind are just more conditioned to sleep deprivation thanks to 3 years with C, and this new addition isn't as much a shock to my system.

I have even managed to get out and see some more Singapore sites. This past week we walked around Fort Canning Park, went to Underwater World on Sentosa Island, and to the Jurong Bird Park. This coming week we hope to get to the Botanical Gardens and the zoo before leaving for Jakarta. So we are definitely keeping busy!

Well, Sir Grunts A lot is currently singing his song, so that's all for now.

Oh BABY!

He's here, he's here! Our newest bundle of love arrived just after midnight on June 23, weighing in at a healthy 8 lbs even. Unfortunately for this blog his name also starts with "C", so I will call him Little C, or LC for short. Labor was soooooo much better this time around, so much shorter, so much less painful, so much less pushing, and I think as a result the recovery is already going better. He is gorgeous, of course, and is sleeping A LOT! I have had to wake him to eat, although I expect that will change over the next few days. He is afterall not yet 3 days old. He looks a lot like his brother did when he was born, although he doesn't have quite the same massive cheek dimensions. C loves his little brother and is happily giving him many hugs and kisses, sharing his toys with him, wanting to hold him, etc.

This morning J got LC's Singapore birth certificate. It still feels a little crazy that my second son was born in Singapore! Tomorrow we head to the US Embassy to start the passport process. We expect it will take about 2 weeks, at which time we can go back to Jakarta.

Here are a couple of photos of LC.

Singapore photos

C and me playing in fountain at Clarke Quay



Merlion

Boat Quay seen from boat ride on Singapore River

View of Singapore from boat

Another view of Singapore from boat

Chinatown Thian Hock Keng Temple in Chinatown

Temple in Little India

A simple update

I'm happy to say I'm finally recovering from a truly miserable few days of mucus, fever, sleeplessness, pain, and discomfort. There should be a global rule that a woman in her ninth month of pregnancy will not have to experience any illness, as she really has enough to deal with just trying to move, sleep, sit, eat. Sunday, the day that C and J arrived, was for most of the day the most miserable day I can remember since being in labor with C. It is just not right to be in pain or discomfort from head to toe for hours on end when you're not even in labor. Finally having my guys with me definitely made me feel better though, and I have been on the road to recovery since their arrival.

Monday morning we took a boat ride on the Singapore River. C, being a typical boy in many respects, loves any sort of transportation vehicle. I am 100% convinced that nature plays a huge role in who boys become versus who girls become, and that it begins very early. One of C's first words was "bus", even though the collection of toys and books at home were an assortment of general, gender neutral baby items and neither J nor I ever thought much about the passing bus on the street, etc. In any case, so C had to that point been on a bus, train, car, motorcycle (we do now live in a city spilling over with motorcycles, so it was inevitable) and airplane, but never a boat. Now he has been on every major form of mechanized transportation vehicle, and his world is complete. We had a very nice ride, admired more of the city, and saw the somewhat famous yet relatively young Merlion statue, the symbol of Singapore. Our boat ride departed from Clarke Quay, a trendy area of town along the river that is brimming with bars and restaurants. Evidently Singaporeans love to eat, so this city is full of good food. At Clarke Quay we saw a Scottish, Moroccan, Cuban, and Mongolian restaurant, to name a few. Unfortunately, neither in Singapore nor Jakarta does there seem to exist an Ethiopian restaurant, much to our dismay. We love Ethiopian food, but it appears that African food just hasn't reached Asia yet, at least not this part of Asia.

This morning we went to Chinatown and walked too much in search of a certain temple and both C and I were dripping by the end of it. Singapore is definitely a humid place. From what I've seen, Singapore also wakes up late. Most of the shops don't seem to open until 11, which is extremely frustrating. I guess if I didn't have a toddler who wakes me up early I might not feel that way - I do love sleeping late and lazy mornings. But that's not the case and to be forced to lose one's morning because nothing is open, when mornings are your most solid block of time because of C's afternoon nap, is frustrating. So anyway, instead of a bustling, vibrant, noisy Chinatown, it was a quiet, mostly closed, clean and not terribly interesting area. As the morning progressed we did start to smell some really wonderful odors wafting from several little Chinese restaurants. Unfortunately we weren't able to stay for lunch, but hopefully we'll be able to return sometime and find out if the food tastes as good as it smells. We did visit a couple temples which were quite striking and made me more interested in visiting China some day. The more interesting temple was Thian Hock Keng Temple. This temple, "the temple of heavenly bliss", used to be located on the shore before land reclamation occurred, and upon landing all boatloads of Chinese visitors and immigrants would come immediately to pay homage to Ma Po Cho, the patron goddess of sailors, for granting them a safe voyage. It was a lovely temple with beautiful and intricate carvings, burning incense and small areas for prayer scattered around the temple. We didn't have much time to explore it, but we're glad we made the long, hot trek to find it.

More Singapore sites to come according to the baby's schedule...

Friday musings

I'm having a very introspective day, with thoughts and ideas and emotions flowing from one to another in a fluid and nonsensical dance. The cause, I'm sure, is due to the 6 days I have spent alone, to the wonderful book I am reading, to the blog entries I'm browsing that seem to mirror my own ponderings, to the fact that I'm about to become a mother for the second time. Really, it should read "a very introspective week" considering all the alone time I've spent in Singapore, but I was too caught up in watching an entire season of 24 to spend any time thinking! But today I have moved away from terrorism and white house conspiracies to reading about a fictional woman's realization that her mother is insane and that she has fallen out of love with her husband. Talk about a reversal of entertainment!

So this week I've had a lot of me time, and I'm eating it up. I've done some out and about activities, but mostly I've just been a couch or computer chair potato. I'm relishing in it, because it's temporary and because I know it will be a long time before I have this again. I've spent time staring out the window at the Singapore skyline, watching ships go past out at sea, or imagining lives in all the little apartment windows I see. I've washed baby clothes, carefully folding them, smelling them, remembering C when he was a baby, and imagining who this next little guy will be and how he will impact our lives and what our family will feel like years from now. I've talked with two best friends and my mom on the phone and been caught up on their lives, relishing in the easy chatter and the love of close friends and family. I've talked to C on the phone many times, and can't quite believe how different it is being away from my son now that he can actually talk to me and tell me about his day. He has the most precious voice in the world and hearing it over phone lines makes me remember how difficult it must be for his grandparents to only hear this over the phone. I've spent time reading my favorite blogs and loving how the internet has opened up this whole new community that allows for connections I would never otherwise have. The book I'm reading now, The Mermaid's Chair, is sweeping me off to a quiet, peaceful Carolina island full of gorgeous imagery, as well as the heartache and torment of imagining falling out of love with a spouse of 20 years. I can't keep up with all the thoughts that are whirling around in my brain today. I actually need J and C to come calm me down!

But unfortunately I need to bring myself back to reality and get some tasks accomplished on my to-do list: a fridge without milk, a hospital tour to arrange, a shower that suddenly has no hot water. I think I prefer the philosophical musings...

Summer in Singapore

Many apologies for the long lapse of time between posts. It was a very busy week last week and then the "move" to Singapore, so I am just catching my breath after a couple days of sleep and rest and several episodes of 24.

I came here on Saturday, which was evidently a couple days too far into my pregnancy for Singapore Air's comfort. Fortunately we got it worked out ahead of time (after a very anxious day on the phone with them) and there were no problems checking in and boarding the flight. It all worked out, but as the days neared to my flight I started to become very nervous about waiting until the last minute to fly here. What if the baby decided to come even earlier than would be usual? It was something I did not want to find out. Now, I could deliver in Jakarta and most likely everything would be just fine. I know several women who delivered their babies there and they all had positive experiences. So the reasoning behind coming to Singapore is not really a fear of low quality of care. What I was afraid of was being in a situation where the nurses may not speak great English and of course my underwhelming abilities in Bahasa Indonesia would get me nowhere in a medical setting. If there's an emergency, I want to know exactly what's going on. Also, I don't like my doctor back in Jakarta very much. Since I knew I was coming here and this is my second child, I never bothered to find a different doctor in Jakarta. He was fine for my situation, but considering he is pro-C-section (ahhh!), which is so contrary to my beliefs, he is not the OB I'd want to deliver with. Yet another reason, and this is probably the most important: my blood type is RH negative. Only 1% of Indonesians have RH negative blood, compared to about 15% of Americans and Europeans (if I'm remembering that correctly). What this means is that if there was an emergency and I needed blood, they might have difficulty finding it for me (I did learn about a group of expats who are RH neg. that regularly give blood to maintain a blood supply for us. I will join it once I'm back). Again, NOT a situation I want to find myself in... And finally, J's company is paying for us to be here, so why not?!

Our temporary apartment here in Singapore is quite nice. We have a 3-bedroom so it is somewhat spacious. The furnishings are updated and there is a lot of light, as well as some great views of the city. There is a huge swimming pool and kiddie pool, an indoor and outdoor play area for C, and a resident's lounge which I have yet to check out. It is also conveniently located above a mall, so I need only go downstairs to go grocery shopping (and they deliver for free to the apartments, which is oh so convenient at 8 months pregnant), find a restaurant, pick up baby supplies, etc. It isn't within walking distance of much, but they have shuttles to different points around the city and taxis are fairly inexpensive. So, basically, it will be a nice place to live for about 6 weeks.

I haven't done much around town yet. And whatever I end up doing will be limited due to lack of general mobility I'm sure. I did get out and do some shopping yesterday. It's a fun time to shop in Singapore right now. For about 6 weeks from May-July the whole city has the Great Singapore Sale, where all the shops have big sales. As a result, my experience yesterday was part bliss, part torture. All of these sales and all of these clothes that are currently out of reach for me. I did manage to find a few things that I could use now and in the coming months, but mostly I just looked through shop windows and drooled and cried. I'm sure J is thrilled though, as I'm not able to run up our credit card bill. I have already planned, however, to return next June and have some fun (anyone care to join me for a shopping spree??).

A friend back in Jakarta introduced me to a woman who is also from Jakarta and here in Singapore to give birth. She is staying at the same place as me so I'm sure we will get to know eachother over the coming weeks. I also just learned of another woman in the same situation and hopefully I will be able to meet her as well. It will be nice to make some friends here with whom I can waddle the sidewalks of Singapore.

J and C arrive on Sunday, after C's big end-of-year concert at school. They are doing an Around the World theme and C is going to be an Indian, for the American West dance that his class is doing. Half of the class are cowboys and the other half Indians. They have been practicing for weeks and I have no idea what a group of 2 year olds are going to do. J will videotape it for me. I don't have high hopes that C will cooperate with them though. He refused to put on his halloween costume last year, and although I don't consider him to be a really stubborn kid, he definitely refuses to budge once in a while. At playgroup last week all the kids let their moms trace their body outline on paper for a coloring activity, except for C. He had no interest in that what-so-ever and nothing I said made a difference. I guess it's a good thing that he knows how to stick to his guns and doesn't cave into peer pressure (he didn't care at all that all the other kids were doing it). He does love coloring though. His activities at home consist mostly of going on walks/bike rides, playing with his cars, and coloring. Maybe my mom will have another artist in the family afterall.

Exploring Jakarta

This past Saturday we went to the old Dutch colonial area of Jakarta, in an area known as Kota. The central cobblestone square, Taman Fatahillah, is still there, as are some of the old colonial era buildings. Unfortunately many of the buildings are in ruin and nothing has been done with the square. It is a real shame, as it could be quite lovely around there and most assuredly a tourist destination. I could still get an idea of what it must have been like in its heyday, but now there is little to do or see. Someday, perhaps the Jakarta government or some enterprising, rich businessperson will take an interest in it and develop it.

We did go to the puppet museum, or Wayang Museum, which has one of the best collections of wayang puppets in Java. The museum itself isn't terribly impressive, but some of the puppets were very interesting. A museum worker told us some of the history of the puppets, what they're used for, etc. For example, the flat, intricately carved leather shadow puppets, called wayang kulit, are often used to teach children about right and wrong, morals, etc. They are produced in Bali and Java. We also saw many wonderful examples of wayang golek, which are the 3-d wooden puppets typically found in West and Central Java. Wayang theater comes from the Hindu-Buddhist heritage in Java, and the stories of the wayang kulit are often based on the Hindu epics, the Ramayana and Mohabharata. A whole night might be devoted to just one story, and in addition to being used to teach children, they may also be performed to protect a crop, a village or people. There is only one puppeteer manipulating all of the puppets, and the show is sometimes accompanied by a gamelan (traditional orchestra of 60-80 musical instruments).

Wayang kulit

There is also the Jakarta History Museum and a Fine Arts Museum in Kota, but unfortunately C didn't enjoy the puppet museum as much as we had hoped so we figured visiting another museum was not a good option.

After the museum we went and had a drink at Cafe Batavia, which is located on the same square and is housed in apparently the only very nicely renovated colonial building in Kota. It is easy to be swept back in time and imagine yourself as a Dutch colonialist, well dressed and sipping a cocktail after a long hot day in Jakarta. The upstairs bar and restaurant is constructed in all teak wood, and the whole cafe is filled with old pictures and photographs. It was evidently included in Newseek International's 1994 and 1996 Worlds Best Bars editions. The place reminded me of The Tobacco Company restaurant in Richmond, VA, where I have been a couple times with my sister-in-law, husband and my best girlfriends for a girlfriends weekend. We will definitely return to Cafe Batavia another time, without children, and when I can truly enjoy one of their many cocktails.

From here we went to the old port of Sunda Kelapa, which was full of Makassar schooners. There wasn't much activity but it was a fun add-on. We were expecting more majestic looking boats, although I don't know why now that I think about it.

Being there, at a fishing port, made me think of one of my all time favorite experiences. While living in Mali J and I went down to the Ivory Coast for a vacation. We stayed on the beach in a little hut, had fresh fish for dinner every night cooked by the "hotel" owner, almost drowned in the undercurrent... Anyway, we went into the town of Sassandra one day to take a boat tour of the mangrove forests, and were fortunate enough to be there when the fishing boats came in. This wasn't a "port", but just the beach where large, brightly painted canoes came to shore bearing fishermen and the day's hauling. The sun was bright and the beach was bustling with fishermen and customers busy bargaining the price of fish, and the beach was filled with manta rays, small sharks, and large fish being cut up and sold. It was incredibly colorful and active and a lot of fun, and one of my favorite memories of West Africa.

Purgatory

I think I have entered the "bla" zone, purgatory, a black hole. I have no energy to do anything and have been procrastinating everything I possibly can. I feel like a blob, which I'm sure is due in part to the big blob of a belly protruding from my mid-section. The rain every morning has not helped either, as that seems to have set my mood for the rest of every day.

I have been so busy for so long and now I am ready. Waiting. Our furniture is here, the baby's room is ready, baby's clothes are washed, plane tickets bought, lists of what to pack are made, and now I just need to wait. This train has come to a full stop and I'm finding it hard to start up the engine again for even the smallest of tasks. I'm not wanting to do much and have little energy to do any of it. I am trying to convince myself that it is ok to be a slacker, to relax, and to be a bum. However, this is not really in my nature, at least not for more than a day or two, so it is not an easy transition.

I leave for Singapore in 17 days. 17 days of waiting to get on a plane, and then more waiting after a short period of settling into our new temporary digs for the baby to come. And then of course our lives will be thrown once more into a tailspin and I will berate myself for even once second of not enjoying this restful, slow period.

C's horse and carriage ride

Evidently there is a resident horse and carriage in our neighborhood, and the owner generously takes children on short rides from time to time. C had the opportunity to take a ride the other day. He had fun, as you can tell.

Some women with their babies watching the horse and carriage.

Update on friends' baby boys

A long time ago, in a land far, far away (the Sultan Hotel, to be exact) I wrote about a couple baby boys that needed some strong positive energy and prayers sent out into the universe for them. I had just learned that the sister of one of my best friends had to deliver her baby (Little A) at 24 weeks and that another friend's son (Gabriel) would have to have another heart surgery.

I am happy to report that Little A is still strong and has every intention of exploring our wide world. I have been following all of his updates and despite some very rough patches, he is doing well now and gaining weight, digesting breast milk, breathing on his own, etc. He had to have eye surgery but his parents report that it went well and they do not expect he will be blind. One big concern is that he was diagnosed with periventricular leukomalacia, or PVL. PVL is characterized by the death of the white matter of the brain due to softening of the brain tissue. Premature babies are at the greatest risk of the disorder. PVL is caused by a lack of oxygen or blood flow to the periventricular area of the brain, which results in the death or loss of brain tissue. The doctors will have to monitor how this will effect him in the future and they may not know just what effects this may have on Little A until he's 18 months old when they assess some developmental milestones. Hopefully he will continue to prosper and there will be no need to worry in the end.

The other little boy I mentioned is my friend Emily's son, Gabriel. He was diagnosed with D-Transposition of the Great Arteries, minimal Pulmonary Stenosis, and a bicuspid valve 24 hours after he was born. Within about 10 days after birth he had to undergo open heart surgery. He is doing great, and as you can see below, by far one of the best looking boys in the world. Unfortunately he will have to have another heart surgery next week to repair some scar tissue, and Emily has asked that friends post his photo in order to generate as many prayers as possible to help him come through smoothly and successfully.

So please, send out a prayer or positive thought or energy or whatever you want to call it for Gabriel and Little A. Thank you!

Language acquisition

Satu, dua, tiga, empat, lima, enam, tujuh, delapan, sembilan, sepuluh. This is what I'm currently hearing coming from the other room as C recites 1-10 in Bahasa Indonesia (BI) to his nanny. He counts better than we do now.

I had high hopes before coming here that C would become fluent in BI. Instead we found a fabulous nanny who speaks unbelievable English. I think this is for the best - when it comes to my child I don't want there to be any miscommunication. But the downside is that he won't be the fluent BI speaker I thought he would. I am happy though that he is learning some. The baby-to-be will, I imagine, be a fluent BI speaker if we stay long enough. I already plan to ask the nanny and the other staff to speak only BI to him, as there is absolutely no better time to learn a foreign language than when you're a child.

J and I are moving slowly in our own BI acquisition. Our tutor comes at night but has had to cancel several lessons, and J and I have not been exemplary students. It is hard to bust out the BI when everyone speaks English so well. We are making progress - BI is not a difficult language - but we really need to practice it. My memory is crammed with BI words that I am not using, and I know there's just not much more space for this kind of unused knowledge in my minuscule memory.

I've also noticed that BI is usurping the space that Bambara (the local language of Mali) used to inhabit. I have had to bite my tongue several times so I wouldn't ask a question or respond in Bambara instead of BI. I was far from fluent in Bambara, but after 2 years of living in a village in Mali, I was certainly conversant. Over the years much of that ability has faded from memory, and now I'm afraid it's going to be completely commandeered by BI. Fortunately I believe my French language abilities are safe; I think I drilled French into my brain for long enough that it isn't going anywhere.

The big boy

C in his big boy bed. The transition has gone fairly smoothly, and so far he doesn't seem interested in going back to his crib. There might have been a minor occurrence this morning, just a little fall and screaming and crying at 4:45 a.m. He evidently thought he needed to get out of bed. Fortunately the fall didn't scare him off and he's back in his bed for a nap. But hopefully it was scary enough to get him to call for us next time (and at a more reasonable hour).

A blog award!

The pressure is really on. I now have to try to live up to this nomination, and all the nice things said about my little blog. Emily at Gabriel's Heart has nominated Indoprism for a Thinking Blog Award! I don't think it is deserved, as I feel like mostly what I do on the blog is regurgitate a description of our activities rather than provide much thought or insight into Indonesia. I still hope that I will do more of that in the future, once I stop doing so many "activities" (ie errands) and start really SEEING this new culture and this new country rather than just the stores and my back yard. In any case, I do feel oh so happy with the nomination and will try to live up to the generous words written by Emily - thank you!

I feel the need to let you in on a little secret though. Emily has been my friend since I was 8 years old. 8 years old! I can hardly believe it. I have only one other friend who I have known so long, my friend L with whom I went to kindergarten and with whom I have kept in touch throughout our school years and beyond. I love having friends in my life who I have known for so long. Anyway, you should check out both Gabriel's Heart and it's sister blog, Emily's original blog, Lovely and Amazing. Her writing is amazing and her ability to put her thoughts and emotions into such honest and beautiful words is supreme. I hardly think I'm energetic in the least compared to what she accomplishes in her life.

So, as the rules require, I am to nominate 5 other blogs for a Thinking Blog Award. Again, I have to tell you a secret, I don't read that many blogs. I enjoy them, but they are so time consuming and I just don't love spending a lot of time in front of a computer. I mostly just read my friends' blogs, plus a couple others I have discovered along the way. I am on the lookout for any other blogs written by parents living abroad though, so if you know of any good ones, please share them with me.

On to the nominations:

1) I don't remember how I came across this one, but I love hearing the words of another mom experiencing life abroad. Emilie of The Flame Tree lives in Kenya, and is truly a gifted writer. She is so adept at providing both insights into Kenya and telling stories about her family, all in beautiful words and ideas that naturally flow from one to another. She also includes poems or other writings to give the blog even more melody and color. I love reading about her experiences abroad, especially in Africa which I miss so much sometimes. All of her posts are worthy, but both Weeks Pass and Intersections are fine examples of what I described.

2) Another very well written blog is Iowadrift, although with a recent move to Massachusetts I wonder if she will change the name... I don't know her, but I do enjoy her writing style and have enjoyed what she says since discovering it. She has also worked abroad and I'm sure that's part of the connection. Her 2 posts about her recent trip to Mali, Mali and Encore Mali got me hooked for the long haul.

3) This nomination is probably not original in the least, as it is a very well-known blog and has probably been nominated and shared many times. But, it is one of my favorites and if you haven't been fortunate enough to discover it yet, then please realize you have just found a four leaf clover. Heather at dooce is one of the funniest and wittiest women I have heard. She is so witty and so gifted at story telling that she is able to earn her living through her blog alone. I laugh at loud at almost every post. The post A Labor Story is the one that hooked me and is still probably my favorite. It is long, but it will make you laugh and may even make you cry. I think it should be required reading for every pregnant woman, and forbidden reading for every woman who has never been pregnant but may be someday. There are reasons why women don't describe labor in such detail - we want to trap you all first! I can relate to A LOT of what she wrote, based on C's birth.

4) My next nomination is for a friend's blog, Mistersugar. This is a somewhat personal nomination, as I mostly like to check in on what my friend and his family are doing. I also like reading about places and events in the triangle area of NC, where I did my graduate program. But he is also a good writer and is full of interesting links and information about things or people I know nothing about. And talk about energy! I don't know where he finds the time to work full-time, be such an engaged husband and father, and do all the extracurricular activities he describes in his blog.

5) My final nomination is again for a friend's blog, Gabriel's Kazoo. I'm just so happy she's writing again after a 4 month hiatus, I had to nominate her! I mostly enjoy finding out what she and her family are doing, but she is also a talented writer and she continuously impresses me with managing both medical school and new parenthood at the same time! Welcome back C! Howdeedo is her post where she resurfaces from what I'm sure was a grueling last few months of medical school.


And so there ya go, consider yourselves nominated!